And then I look closer
- you know, closer than you want anyone else to look at your life, let alone your marriage-
and realize that in the grand scheme of marriage and life, we really haven't moved much. There have been days, a lot of days, where I think "How have I not figured this out yet; We had this same fight 3 years ago". Those days usually come shortly after the days when I think "hey, we are starting to figure this marriage thing out".
Pshh yeah right.
It is amazing how I manage to still say the same stupid things I know will make Simon mad and vice-versa. I react in the same hot headed ways that send him over the edge. We waste effort taking for granted the big things and making a big deal over silly, insignificant things.
I mean honestly, you would think that my marriage would be way easier than this since I am so uncomplicated and easy to live with.
Especially since I married such an open book who is atuned to his emotions and has a firm grasp on my passive-aggressive subtleties.
I can officially say that after three years, we are miles past the sugar coated ooey-gooey stage. But there is something refreshing and humbling and, well, real about doing real life together.
We have gotten to do some really fun and memorable things in these three years. We've been able to travel to Greece, Germany, Austria. We've lived in Arkansas, Texas, South Carolina. We have even gotten to go on some exciting adventures in this past year alone: getting to spend Christmas and New Years in Germany, a mountain ski trip, moving to a new apartment and city, all moments that have been surrounded with good friends and family who have made these three years special in ways we couldn't have imagined.
There are countless things about our life together that I couldn't have predicted or imagined. Some of the most beautiful and special moments I have been able to share with a husband whom I love more than I've ever loved anyone else. Those good moments have been coupled with the most difficult and frustrating times that have tested our patience and loyalty and character. Through it all we have grown closer and been made stronger. I can truly say that God blessed me with a husband who challenges my strengths and helps better my weaknesses. A husband who works hard to be what and who I need, and expects that same commitment from me.
He and I, amidst many similarities, are very very different. We knew before we started that our relationship would be a journey of learning how to communicate better, and commit to understanding this other person who does things, and thinks about things so differently.
It is a challenge.
It has been work.
And at times we have both stepped back and asked what we have gotten ourselves into.
But I can honestly say, that through every challenge, disappointment, accomplishment, and celebration, I have been changed into a stronger, more honest, more loving, and better woman than I ever would have, or could have been, without the man I married three years ago today. God knows me better than I know myself, and he knew what he was doing when he led this beautiful, generous, loving and stubborn man to choose me. I cannot imagine that Simon was prepared for the mess of a person I ended up being, but I hope that in three years from now, I can look back on today and be as proud of where we are and how much we have changed and learned and grown, as I am today, for better or for worse.
Happy Anniversary Simon Reinhardt.
Thanks for being exactly who I need.
Told ya we could do it :)